AFTER the trial of my faith.

There are so many things that I could say in this post and so many explanations that I feel like I might owe to my readers (HA. I say this like I have a fan base..what a joke.) however, it's not time for that. These past few weeks have been physically, emotionally, and spiritually trying, but I have learned SO much. Nights of anxiety and silent battles have slowly faded away. Now I'm left with the good stuff. The knowledge that I gained as I cried over my scriptures or called my parents in despair. And some of it is really awesome so I just have to share.

Most of you know that I've been really anxious about my future. Mission vs School vs Beauty School. Over and over and over in my head. I started heading in one direction. But a little epiphany and one conversation later put that direction on hold. And these words rang in my head, "It doesn't matter as much what career you choose. Heavenly Father wants you to give yourself to Him and become a good person like Him." My daddy's a smart one, no?
And then this quote, "Anything that a woman does with full purpose of heart, with an eye to the glory of God, as an expression of her dedication to doing what the Lord asks of her individual talents and abilities for the betterment of people and thereby society, is worthwhile and valuable work - is ordained of God." -HDH

And then this video.

And then I was still racked with pain and indecision. I had a blessing, I was going to the temple, I studied my scriptures, I fasted, I was praying my little heart out, but still nothing. BUT I DIDN'T GIVE UP. I knew that it would come eventually. All I needed was peace.

And then it started to come. I forgot that healing is a process. I forgot that just like revelation, peace doesn't always come over night. Sometimes it slowly creeps up on you, after you've worked and worked and worked. I forgot that sometimes you have to have faith and work and then work some more.
I forgot that just because I was willing to give myself to the Lord didn't mean that it was going to be rainbows and butterflies!
Ether 12.6
6 And now, I, Moroni, would speak somewhat concerning these things; I would show unto the world that ^afaith is things which are^bhoped for and ^cnot seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no ^dwitness until after the ^etrial of your faith.

And then this blog post.
http://aspiringmormonwomen.org/2014/04/02/deliverance/

So life is good. I'm back. I'm up and running.
More details about my life to come. :)